Like You, I'm Trying To Do The "Vacation Thing” Better

July 5, 2022

A college president dropped into a team meeting I was facilitating last week, and her team said, “Hey, I thought you were on vacation this week.” The president said, “I’m struggling to stay away.”


Most leaders I know struggle with taking vacations of any kind.


I’m curious if you do because I am planning a bit of a sabbatical in July, and I’m not sure I REALLY want to. 


It’s been an epic battle for me over the years.


I LOVE THE WORK.

Many leaders never take a real break. As a result, they end up breaking.


Instead, we cheat (like the college leader mentioned above). You cheat yourself (and your family) by popping on email for an hour every morning. Or by checking in with staff to see if anything’s on fire.


Or maybe you’ve done a “working vacation” (oxymoron) to work on a big project or write a book.


I’ve done all those things, but lately, I’ve been TRYING to be more intentional about taking more real vacations and real breaks.


Like you, I’m trying to do the “vacation thing” better. 


The more driven you are, the more this truth is for you. 


These are some things I’ve experienced in my attempts to gear down over the past year. 

1. Discomfort

When you’re constantly busy, you get used to a fast pace and the hum of always having something needing your attention.


When you take a real break, the quiet outside reveals the disquiet within you.


Pay attention to the discomfort but don’t give into it. Don’t race to fill the stillness with activity. 


Embrace it.


Inside the quiet, you’ll discover a wealth of ideas:

➜ Issues you need to work through.

➜ Fears you need to confront.

➜ Possibilities you never dreamed of before.

➜ You! A fully present and authentic YOU.


If you don’t give in to the discomfort and linger in the silence and quiet long enough, you’ll learn to lead from peace.


As the famous mystic and poet Rumi said, "The soul has been given its ears to hear things the mind does not understand."


Take the discomfort of quiet as a gift and trust that it has something for you. 


2. A Sense Of Being Lost

If you’re used to running at a fast pace, you won’t know exactly what to do with yourself, and you might feel a bit lost. 


That’s totally ok. 


If you do this well, you’ll eventually find a deeper and more mature you. In addition to lingering in the stillness, resist the urge to fill the void with a surge of activity.


Allowing yourself to feel lost will help you find a restored you.


The inner battle is where all growth emerges.


3. Productivity Shame

Productivity shame is what you feel when your life goes from 110 mph to zero overnight.

So, what is productivity shame exactly?


According to the leaders at Rescue Time, first, it’s the feeling that you’ve never done enough. No matter how many hours you work or how many tasks you cross off your to-do list, you always feel a sense of shame around your work. You keep thinking you could have done more.


Second, productivity shame is the feeling that you aren’t allowed to do “unproductive” things. You feel a sense of guilt when you spend time on hobbies, watch a movie, or simply sit back and relax.


Oh, this is killing me! 


You?


4. Tears

Yes, tears. “why on earth am I crying when I’m supposed to be on vacation” tears.

If this is your first foray into being completely off work since the kickoff of the pandemic, then all three factors above may likely lead to tears.


Surprisingly, a good cry signals that you are doing the vacation thing right.


The quiet, discomfort and failure to give in to productivity shame mean you’re giving the silence space to do its work.


The first few times I really unplugged, I learned things about myself (my anger, my achievement addiction, the adrenaline junkie I’d become).

 

And yes, it led to tears. And then therapy and coaching and eventually, to freedom.


The worst thing you can do when you find yourself getting emotional when you’re disconnecting is to shake it off and do what we mid-westerners do… We bury it. 


Let it surface. Surrender to it. 


It’s called growth.


5. A New Baseline

Who are you when you’re fully rested?


My guess is you have no idea how to answer it because the last time you were fully rested, you didn’t have all your permanent teeth in your mouth.


Over the years, I’ve been experimenting with finding my ‘baseline,’ which is how I feel, behave, and approach life when I’m in my non-anxious presence. 


Finding your baseline is a little like the science of speedometer calibration. A speedometer is accurate because it’s calibrated to tell you whether you’re going 35 or 75. 


If the calibration is off, so is your reading.


Many driven leaders lead like their baselines are calibrated to 50 mph. They live at 70-90 mph most of the time. On the weekend, they might come down to 60 or 50 and think, “there, I’m rested.”


But they have no idea there’s even a 20 mph, or 10, or zero. They have no idea who they are deeply rested.


How do you find your baseline?


Take enough time off to sleep and rest until you’re no longer tired. Eat well, exercise, and nap as often as you need to until you’re ‘caught up. Relax, unwind, and get fully rested. Note: This might take a few weeks. Then see who you are.

  • How do you feel?
  • How are you treating other people?
  • What do you enjoy?
  • Who are you now?


That’s your baseline.


The way to do that is to live in a way today that helps you thrive tomorrow. I can show you how to do that here.

 

Find your baseline and get back to it regularly; the next vacation won’t be nearly as hard.


RECLAIM IT!

As we move into the midpoint of summer, you can almost hear that collective “what-the…” from campus leaders across the country. 


Who’s been able to take a break yet?


I had a college president who told me that she “HOPES” to take the 4th of July off “IF” she can complete all her hiring.


I feel her pain and yours. 


The challenges left in the wake of these past two years have many leaders taking extended leave and others left to do most of the work. 


The question is, “is it sustainable?”


I know how much this summer break is needed, and I trust that your calendar has some dates marked off for you to truly get away. 


But don’t be fooled. 


I’m here to remind you that many of those same problems and issues will await you and your team when you return in the fall.   


Leaders hate when I say this (while they shake their heads in agreement), but managing crisis was challenging but leading OUT of crisis will be much more complex and demanding. 


Healthy leaders and teams will be in high demand to build (not rebuild) the plans and strategies to navigate the uncharted territory ahead. 


You need to take action and Reclaim Your Momentum!


You may be one of the hundreds who requested and downloaded my free guide on reclaiming your momentum in the past few weeks and months. The feedback I’ve received from so many of you continues to be overwhelming. 


Because of that, I’m going on tour. 


I’ve turned this essential topic into a 2-hour LIVE keynote that I’m delivering to campus leadership teams across the county this summer and fall. 


If you’re like most campus leaders, you’ve spent countless hours these past years putting out fires, dealing with negativity, drama, and just plain old burnout across the board. 


And, like so many others, you’re fed up with feeling stuck. 


It’s time to take action.


For a limited time, I’m offering an Early Bird Discount for campuses that book our new 2-hour live keynote before July 30th! 


Click here for the details.


What are you waiting for?


It would be an honor to be your guide and help you and your team regain lost ground and Reclaim Your Momentum. 


Joe


Dr. Joe Hill 

Founder, Higher Performance Group


P.S. Be sure to share this email with a team member or fellow leaders across your network who could use a nudge of inspiration and challenge. Together we can help raise the waterline of hope, stability, trust, and compassion for those doing the most good across our learning communities. 


Click here to learn more.



See What Reclaim Your Momentum {LIVE} is All About

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Why Your Cabinet Is Exhausted and Your Results Are Flat LEADER INSIGHTS: Weekly Team Intelligence for Educational Leaders | Dr. Joe Hill | Higher Performance Group A superintendent I know — twenty-one years in education, relentlessly strategic, the kind of leader other leaders call when they're stuck — sat down at a regional convening last fall and said something I haven't stopped thinking about. "I feel like we're sprinting. Everybody's exhausted. Nobody can point to what changed." He wasn't describing failure. His district is moving. His board is happy. His cabinet shows up. He was describing something harder to name: the specific exhaustion of motion without transformation. 73% of educational leaders in our 987-team study report feeling perpetually behind — behind on initiatives, behind on trends, behind on where they think they should be by now. You're not behind. You've been playing the wrong game entirely. The institutions actually winning? They stopped playing catch-up years ago. They're running a fundamentally different game — with fundamentally different rules. And here's the plot twist: the game they're playing is actually simpler than the one you're exhausting yourself with right now. TQ = IQ × EQ × PQ. When your team's collective attention is fragmented across twenty-three initiatives, the PQ dimension — positional intelligence, the clarity about who does what and why — collapses toward zero. Anything multiplied by zero produces exactly the strategic outcomes you've been getting. The Diagnosis: Three Games, One Winner Let's talk about this like adults who've survived multiple strategic planning retreats and at least one initiative that died quietly in a Google Drive folder nobody checks anymore. There's a psychological phenomenon researchers call "temporal comparison bias" that explains why brilliant educational leaders — people who've built entire programs, navigated accreditation, turned around failing departments — feel perpetually three steps behind. Here's how it plays out in real time: Monday, 6:45 AM. You're scrolling LinkedIn before your first meeting. A superintendent three states over just announced a groundbreaking AI initiative. Your immediate thought: We should be doing that. Why aren't we doing that? Tuesday, 2:30 PM. Conference call with peer institutions. Someone mentions their new enrollment strategy showing "promising results." You add "explore enrollment strategy overhaul" to the list of seventeen other things you're currently "exploring." Wednesday, 10:00 AM. Cabinet meeting. Your VP of Academic Affairs wants to discuss three new program launches. Your CFO has concerns about falling behind on facilities. Your Provost is worried about losing ground in faculty development. By Friday, your strategic priorities list has grown from eight items to fourteen. None have moved forward. All are justified by fear of falling further behind. The institutions you think are "ahead" aren't managing more initiatives better. They're managing fewer with singular focus. That superintendent with the AI initiative? She killed four other initiatives to create space for it. You're not behind them. You're just carrying different weight. They're running a 5K. You're running a marathon with a 50-pound backpack and wondering why you can't keep pace. The real problem? You've been optimizing for coverage when you should be optimizing for impact. Coverage thinking: We need to be doing something in every area — enrollment, retention, innovation, facilities, faculty development, student experience, community engagement, technology, equity. Impact thinking: What's the one thing that, if we did it exceptionally well, would make everything else easier or unnecessary? Coverage creates the illusion of progress. Impact creates actual transformation. (This is exactly why The Team Institute exists — not to add more to your plate, but to help your entire leadership cabinet build the collective capacity to decide what belongs on the plate in the first place.) The Framework: The Three Games Call this the Strategic Games Framework. Or don't. It'll still explain why your last strategic plan produced a beautiful document that nobody references six months later. Every educational institution is playing one of three games. Most don't realize they have a choice. The ones winning? They chose deliberately. Game 1: The Comparison Game (Where 70% of leaders live) Success means keeping pace with everyone else. Winning looks like never falling too far behind the pack. Losing looks exactly the same as winning — just with more anxiety. Average strategic priorities per institution playing this game: 12 to 18. Average implementation completion rate: 34%. Leadership energy spent managing initiatives vs. actually transforming: 85% management, 15% transformation. This game is unwinnable. The moment you catch up, the benchmark moves. It's an infinite treadmill where "ahead" doesn't exist — only "less behind." The insidious part? It feels productive. Lots of meetings. Lots of planning. Lots of slide decks. Zero transformation. Game 2: The Innovation Game (Where 20% of disruptors live) Success means being first. Winning looks like conference keynotes and site visits from peer institutions. Losing looks like spectacular failures that become cautionary tales. The Innovation Game is seductive because it feels like leadership — you're not following, you're pioneering. But here's the trap: innovation without implementation infrastructure creates what I call pilot program purgatory — brilliant ideas that launch with fanfare, then quietly fade when the hard work of institutionalization begins. 8 to 12 new initiatives launched per year. 2 to 3 that survive past Year 2. 60% of cabinet capacity consumed managing "innovation." You're pioneering new approaches faster than your institution can absorb change. It's like trying to teach someone to swim by throwing them in the ocean during a storm. Technically teaching swimming. Practically creating trauma. Game 3: The Multiplication Game (Where the 10% who actually win live) Success means multiplying what already works. Winning produces consistent, compound growth that looks boring from the outside but transforms everything from the inside. Your strategy: Subtraction before addition. Multiplication before innovation. Depth before breadth. The institutions winning this game look unimpressive in conference presentations. No flashy AI initiatives (yet). No radical restructuring (yet). Instead: they took the three things they were already decent at and became exceptional at them. Then they built the capacity to add a fourth. That sequencing is everything. It's the TQ formula applied to institutional strategy — not scattered individual initiatives, but collective focus that compounds. IQ × EQ × PQ, multiplied at the team level, aimed at three things instead of twenty-three. The Case Study: Michael's $0 Transformation Let me tell you about a president I'll call Michael. (Not his real name — but Michael, your former Provost absolutely knows this story is about your first two years together, and she's probably nodding vigorously right now.) Michael led a regional public university: 11,000 students, seven colleges, a cabinet of 10 VPs averaging 21 years of experience each. Combined credentials that could staff a small think tank. Combined ability to finish what they started? Roughly equivalent to a book club that's been "reading" the same book for three years. What Michael inherited: 6 major strategic priorities. 23 sub-initiatives. 14 presidential task forces. 8 pilot programs in "evaluation." 147 action items. Zero clear accountability for whether any of it was working. His first six months were consumed by progress reports: "We had three focus groups." "We're gathering stakeholder input." "We're exploring best practices." Activity everywhere. Impact nowhere. Then Michael did something radical. He stopped playing the Comparison Game. He asked his cabinet one question: If we could only do three things exceptionally well over the next two years — three things that would demonstrably transform student outcomes — what would they be? The room went silent. His VP of Student Affairs said what everyone was thinking: "Are you saying we stop doing everything else?" "I'm saying we stop pretending we're doing everything else. Right now, we're doing 23 things at 40% quality. I'm proposing we do 3 things at 95% quality." Months 1–3: Eliminated 20 of 23 initiatives. Dissolved 11 of 14 task forces. Concentrated resources on three priorities: first-year experience transformation, career-connected learning, and faculty excellence in teaching. Months 4–12: Meetings dropped from 3.5 hours to 90 minutes. Decision velocity increased 4x. Implementation completion rate went from 34% to 89%. Year 2 results: First-year retention: +8.7% — largest single-year increase in school history Career placement within 6 months of graduation: +12.3% Faculty teaching excellence scores: +15% across all colleges Cabinet meeting time: cut in half Leadership team: "Finally feels like we're making progress instead of managing chaos" Same people. Same budget. Same external constraints. Same competitive environment. Different game. If you recognize the gap between your cabinet's talent and what you're actually producing together — and you suspect another individual development program won't close it — this is exactly what The TEAM INSTITUTE was built for. Not a workshop. Not a retreat. An 8-month sequential operating system your entire cabinet builds together, from trust to focused execution, applied to your actual strategic challenges. We don't fix people. We multiply systems. More on that below. The Application: Switching Games Here's what to do this week — assuming your calendar isn't already booked with meetings about meetings, in which case, that's actually your first problem: Step 1: The Brutal Subtraction Audit (90 minutes, next cabinet meeting) Put every current "strategic priority" on the board. Not just the official ones — the real ones. Every initiative people are actually working on. Every pilot being "evaluated." Every task force meeting monthly. Ask three questions about each: Does this produce measurable transformation in student outcomes — not stakeholder engagement, not data gathered, actual outcomes? Are we providing 70% or more of what this initiative actually needs to succeed, or are we setting people up to fail while calling it strategic? And does this build future capacity, or will it always require its own dedicated resources? Then force rank everything. Not 'these are all important.' Actual forced ranking. Stop at three. Everything below three? Stop doing it. Not 'deprioritize.' Not 'put on hold.' Stop. (Someone will invoke sunk cost: 'But we've already invested so much in X!' The investment is already gone. The question is whether you keep throwing resources at it. That's not strategy. That's loyalty to a decision that isn't working.) Step 2: The Capacity Calculation (30 minutes, solo) For each of your top three priorities, calculate the actual hours per week required — from the leadership team and from implementation teams — multiplied by 42 working weeks. Add all three together. Do you actually have that capacity, or are you assuming people will "make it work" by eliminating evenings and weekends? If the honest answer is no, you're still in the Addition Game. Reduce scope, eliminate something else, or accept that you're asking people to work unsustainably. Pick one. Step 3: The Multiplication Protocol (Ongoing) For the next 90 days, before adding any new initiative, task force, pilot, or "exploration," your cabinet must answer one question: What are we stopping to create space for this? Not "we'll find time." An actual answer. If you can't name what you're stopping, you can't start the new thing. Track two numbers: addition-to-subtraction ratio (1:1 or better means you're in the Multiplication Game) and implementation completion rate (below 50% means scattered attention producing scattered results; 80%+ means you've actually switched games). On the Objections: "But our board expects us to address all of these areas." Your board expects outcomes, not activity reports. What would happen if you walked in with this: "We focused all our capacity on three priorities. First-year retention is up 8.7%. Career placement is up 12.3%. Faculty excellence scores are up 15%." Boards don't micromanage success. They micromanage stagnation. Produce compound results and they stop asking why you're not doing more. The Maturity Shift On priorities: "We need to be doing more to stay competitive." → "We need to be doing less, exceptionally well, to actually transform." On activity: Confuses meetings completed with momentum. → Measures transformation produced, not initiatives launched. On the competition: Watches what peers are doing and adds to the list. → Watches what's working internally and multiplies it. On capacity: Assumes "we'll find time." Burns people out. Repeats. → Calculates actual capacity. Subtracts before adding. Compounds. You're not behind. You've been playing the wrong game. The Multiplication Game is harder to start — subtracting things you've invested in, having honest conversations about actual capacity, saying no to things that matter — but it's infinitely more sustainable. And the institutions winning it? They look boring from the outside and transformational from the inside. Your Turn: Which game is your cabinet actually playing? Drop one word in the comments: COMPARISON, INNOVATION, or MULTIPLICATION. Then tag a cabinet member who you think would answer differently than you would. That gap in perception? That's the data. Or screenshot the three game descriptions and text them to your leadership team with one question: "Which game are we actually playing right now?" Ready to Stop Playing Catch-Up? Here's what I know after studying 987 leadership teams across 43 states: the cabinet that can't agree on three priorities isn't struggling with strategy. It's struggling with trust. Without trust, subtraction conversations become political. Capacity calculations become weaponized. Forced ranking becomes a turf war. That's why the Multiplication Game isn't something you implement from a newsletter. You need your entire cabinet in the room, building the same foundation, in sequence — not a two-day retreat you'll never quite finish, but a sustained developmental arc that actually rewires how your team thinks together. That's what The TEAM INSTITUTE was built to do. The TEAM INSTITUTE is an 8-month journey that takes your cabinet from individually brilliant to collectively unstoppable — sequentially, through trust, empowerment, collaboration, and focused execution, each month building on the last. You can't skip trust and go straight to strategy. That's not leadership development. That's wishful thinking with a facilitator. The results from teams that complete the full sequence: 3x performance improvement. 29% higher engagement. 27% better organizational outcomes. Zero burnout increase. Not because we fixed anyone — because we changed the system they were operating in. The requirement is simple and non-negotiable: full cabinet participation. Partial engagement produces partial results. You cannot build team-level multiplication with individual-level development. That's the model that got you here. If you're a leader who sees the gap between your cabinet's talent and your collective results — and you're ready to stop treating that gap as a motivation problem — let's talk. Schedule a 30-minute consultation to explore whether The Team Institute is the right fit for your leadership context. This isn't a sales pitch. It's a conversation between people who refuse to accept that "busy" and "effective" mean the same thing. [LEARN MORE] higherperformancegroup.com [SCHEDULE CONSULTATION] Found value in this? Help other educational leaders find it: → Repost with your honest answer — which game is your cabinet actually playing? → Tag a leader who's exhausted from the Addition Game and ready to switch → Comment with the one initiative you know you should stop but haven't — naming it is the first step The more leaders who shift from addition to multiplication, the better our educational systems become. Follow DR. JOE HILL and Higher Performance Group for weekly Team Intelligence insights. Next issue: "Your Cabinet Mistakes Consensus for Alignment (And It's Killing Every Decision)" We'll explore why your leadership team spends three meetings nodding in agreement, then fragments in seventeen different directions the moment they leave the room. Spoiler: You don't have an alignment problem. You have a 'we've never actually defined what alignment means' problem. And the text messages your VPs send each other after cabinet meetings? Those are where your real strategic plan lives. Dr. Joe Hill | Higher Performance Group | The Team Institute higherperformancegroup.com
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