Six Surprising Reasons Campus Leaders Drift Into Isolation

June 14, 2022

Ever wonder why leadership often feels so lonely? 


I routinely hear from leaders who give me some version of 'It's lonely at the top' or 'I don't think anyone understands how I feel."


Many of these amazing people - once deeply connected - move into leadership and suddenly feel… well…cut off.


I get it. I'm meeting with loads of people weekly in person and on social and still feel isolated as a leader.


This topic matters because isolation isn't good for you.


Yup… Especially us Introverts.

Medical experts say the impact of loneliness on your healthy is equivalent to smoking 15 cigarettes a day and is possibly worse than obesity. Isolated people risk having a significantly shorter life span.


In other words, loneliness kills.


Think about it. Besides the death penalty, solitary confinement is one of the worst punishments we sentence prisoners.

Yet we invite what the prison system hands out as punishment without much thought.


Why is that?


There's a gravitational pull toward isolation in leadership that you must fight to stay healthy, alive, vibrant, and growing.

Here are six surprising reasons campus leaders naturally drift into isolation.


1. The Problems You Must Solve Aren't Solvable By Most People 


By title, most people aren't in positions of leadership.


Look at any campus. The ratio of the faculty/employee to leader/executives is probably 10:1, if not 100:1. So, you're definitely taking on challenges unique to your role.


Therefore, it can be hard to relate when you show up to that social gathering and others are there fully present and relatively carefree. That's not bad, and there is nothing wrong with you. Most people don't wake up (and stay awake) trying to solve the same problems you do.


Leading in a challenging season makes that even more complicated and sets the challenges you're tackling into even rarer air.


Think about it. Most people can't relate to you because they simply haven't managed what you're leading. It's not their fault at all—it's just hard to engage others when you don't have similar lived experiences.


To find peers and mentors who actually "get" you, you'll likely have to break down a few geographical and institutional barriers.

You may need to look outside your system, region, or field to get the coaching and connection you need.


When I was awakened to the fact that I couldn't gain the full insight and wisdom I needed from my immediate circle of colleagues and friends, it made a few things more manageable.


  1. First, it helped me value those around me for who they were and allowed me to drop the expectations around what they couldn't offer.
  2. Second, it made me realize I'd have to seek out other leaders who could speak into what I was leading, which would likely take some initiative.


2. The Last 10% of Leadership is the Loneliest


So, you might be thinking, "what about the good people around me whom I hired to help lead the organization?"


Absolutely. Lean in.


They can help you immensely. But as already described, you'll find that their ability to empathize, understand and help breaks down to (at best) the 90% level.


That last 10% (who should be my next strategic hire/how can I turn around the trends I'm seeing/why do I feel so uneasy about this pattern) is something they probably can't help you with, and it's also the most critical leadership issue you're facing.


This is why the last 10% of leadership is the loneliest.


The very problem you most need to solve is the area where your team has had the least experience. 


Once again, the people who can help you with the last 10% will be found in a community you need to build for yourself.


3. You Naturally Want To Pivot Away From People


It's a weird dynamic to feel lonely when surrounded by swarms of people daily.


Being surrounded by people all day can make you feel like you're in community when in reality, it's not entirely the kind of community you need (see point #2 above).


One of the best things you can do is fight your natural urge to resist people and instead seek out people who replenish you. I will put myself out there and say that most leaders don't have a very long list of people who replenish them.


So…who replenishes you?


Again, (don't hate me), but if you list your dog and your spouse, I think you need a longer list.


4. Virtual Helps And Hurts


When you're looking for connection, is social media a help or a hindrance?


Social media is a blessing because we're more connected than ever. Learning is easier and faster than at any other time in human history.


But relationally, social media creates a sense of false connection. It gives us the promise of knowing people without really knowing them, and it gives the appearance of relationship without being deeply connected.


To connect with someone you know is one thing. But to connect with 100 people you barely know can leave you feeling defeated and exhausted.


And what do defeated and exhausted people become… 


Yep, lonely.


5. You Spent All Your Energy At Work


I fell for this too often as a young leader. And it's a trap I still must look out for today.


When you take the role of your office seriously, it's easy to spend 100% of your energy at work. Which, of course, means your family gets the leftovers. And it means you, personally, get the fumes.


When you arrive home exhausted and when you give what little you have left to your family (which is already, by definition, too little), you have zero time left over for meaningful friendships or activities you find restorative.


A 5 Star Day is one that is quite productive and focused at work but also highly connected at home.


Remember: Full schedules don't lead to full lives.


6. You're Never Really On, And You're Never Really Off


Because of the pressures of your office, you (and I) will always have a hard time being 'off.' 


There's always more to be done.

But smartphones and the proliferation of inboxes on every social platform and 'advances' like Slack, email, text messaging, and plain old voicemail mean a leader is never really off.


You used to go to work; now, thanks to technology, work goes to you…and never leaves you.


It might be easy to think you're just taking 5 minutes out of your family's movie night to answer a few emails or return some texts, but every interaction takes its toll.


Unless you guard against it, thanks to technology, you're never really on, and you're never really off. You live in a perpetual grey zone.


And again, technology's constant present/not present tension leaves you feeling alone.


Take An Honest Look At The Pace You're Currently Living. Would You Want To Do This Forever?


Looking at the past 12 months, did your habits help you accomplish everything you set out to do last year? 


Here's the truth: You are one of the key influencers to the overall health of your community.


The evidence is compelling. The health of your team and the reliability of your system has a direct impact on your campus performance.


Good News! This summer/fall, I am going on tour with a timely keynote customized for the campus lead teams in my network.

The Mission: To reclaim some needed traction.


Reclaim Your Momentum {LIVE} is a two-hour keynote for campus leaders and their teams to inspire, challenge, and equip your team to accelerate healthy team culture and overall team performance.


Check out the early-bird incentive for booking by July 30th. 


I look forward to talking with you soon!


P.S. June and July are already booked out, and August is starting to fill fast. You don't want to delay. Book your team engagement today.

See What Reclaim Your Momentum {LIVE} is All About

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Why Your Cabinet Is Exhausted and Your Results Are Flat LEADER INSIGHTS: Weekly Team Intelligence for Educational Leaders | Dr. Joe Hill | Higher Performance Group A superintendent I know — twenty-one years in education, relentlessly strategic, the kind of leader other leaders call when they're stuck — sat down at a regional convening last fall and said something I haven't stopped thinking about. "I feel like we're sprinting. Everybody's exhausted. Nobody can point to what changed." He wasn't describing failure. His district is moving. His board is happy. His cabinet shows up. He was describing something harder to name: the specific exhaustion of motion without transformation. 73% of educational leaders in our 987-team study report feeling perpetually behind — behind on initiatives, behind on trends, behind on where they think they should be by now. You're not behind. You've been playing the wrong game entirely. The institutions actually winning? They stopped playing catch-up years ago. They're running a fundamentally different game — with fundamentally different rules. And here's the plot twist: the game they're playing is actually simpler than the one you're exhausting yourself with right now. TQ = IQ × EQ × PQ. When your team's collective attention is fragmented across twenty-three initiatives, the PQ dimension — positional intelligence, the clarity about who does what and why — collapses toward zero. Anything multiplied by zero produces exactly the strategic outcomes you've been getting. The Diagnosis: Three Games, One Winner Let's talk about this like adults who've survived multiple strategic planning retreats and at least one initiative that died quietly in a Google Drive folder nobody checks anymore. There's a psychological phenomenon researchers call "temporal comparison bias" that explains why brilliant educational leaders — people who've built entire programs, navigated accreditation, turned around failing departments — feel perpetually three steps behind. Here's how it plays out in real time: Monday, 6:45 AM. You're scrolling LinkedIn before your first meeting. A superintendent three states over just announced a groundbreaking AI initiative. Your immediate thought: We should be doing that. Why aren't we doing that? Tuesday, 2:30 PM. Conference call with peer institutions. Someone mentions their new enrollment strategy showing "promising results." You add "explore enrollment strategy overhaul" to the list of seventeen other things you're currently "exploring." Wednesday, 10:00 AM. Cabinet meeting. Your VP of Academic Affairs wants to discuss three new program launches. Your CFO has concerns about falling behind on facilities. Your Provost is worried about losing ground in faculty development. By Friday, your strategic priorities list has grown from eight items to fourteen. None have moved forward. All are justified by fear of falling further behind. The institutions you think are "ahead" aren't managing more initiatives better. They're managing fewer with singular focus. That superintendent with the AI initiative? She killed four other initiatives to create space for it. You're not behind them. You're just carrying different weight. They're running a 5K. You're running a marathon with a 50-pound backpack and wondering why you can't keep pace. The real problem? You've been optimizing for coverage when you should be optimizing for impact. Coverage thinking: We need to be doing something in every area — enrollment, retention, innovation, facilities, faculty development, student experience, community engagement, technology, equity. Impact thinking: What's the one thing that, if we did it exceptionally well, would make everything else easier or unnecessary? Coverage creates the illusion of progress. Impact creates actual transformation. (This is exactly why The Team Institute exists — not to add more to your plate, but to help your entire leadership cabinet build the collective capacity to decide what belongs on the plate in the first place.) The Framework: The Three Games Call this the Strategic Games Framework. Or don't. It'll still explain why your last strategic plan produced a beautiful document that nobody references six months later. Every educational institution is playing one of three games. Most don't realize they have a choice. The ones winning? They chose deliberately. Game 1: The Comparison Game (Where 70% of leaders live) Success means keeping pace with everyone else. Winning looks like never falling too far behind the pack. Losing looks exactly the same as winning — just with more anxiety. Average strategic priorities per institution playing this game: 12 to 18. Average implementation completion rate: 34%. Leadership energy spent managing initiatives vs. actually transforming: 85% management, 15% transformation. This game is unwinnable. The moment you catch up, the benchmark moves. It's an infinite treadmill where "ahead" doesn't exist — only "less behind." The insidious part? It feels productive. Lots of meetings. Lots of planning. Lots of slide decks. Zero transformation. Game 2: The Innovation Game (Where 20% of disruptors live) Success means being first. Winning looks like conference keynotes and site visits from peer institutions. Losing looks like spectacular failures that become cautionary tales. The Innovation Game is seductive because it feels like leadership — you're not following, you're pioneering. But here's the trap: innovation without implementation infrastructure creates what I call pilot program purgatory — brilliant ideas that launch with fanfare, then quietly fade when the hard work of institutionalization begins. 8 to 12 new initiatives launched per year. 2 to 3 that survive past Year 2. 60% of cabinet capacity consumed managing "innovation." You're pioneering new approaches faster than your institution can absorb change. It's like trying to teach someone to swim by throwing them in the ocean during a storm. Technically teaching swimming. Practically creating trauma. Game 3: The Multiplication Game (Where the 10% who actually win live) Success means multiplying what already works. Winning produces consistent, compound growth that looks boring from the outside but transforms everything from the inside. Your strategy: Subtraction before addition. Multiplication before innovation. Depth before breadth. The institutions winning this game look unimpressive in conference presentations. No flashy AI initiatives (yet). No radical restructuring (yet). Instead: they took the three things they were already decent at and became exceptional at them. Then they built the capacity to add a fourth. That sequencing is everything. It's the TQ formula applied to institutional strategy — not scattered individual initiatives, but collective focus that compounds. IQ × EQ × PQ, multiplied at the team level, aimed at three things instead of twenty-three. The Case Study: Michael's $0 Transformation Let me tell you about a president I'll call Michael. (Not his real name — but Michael, your former Provost absolutely knows this story is about your first two years together, and she's probably nodding vigorously right now.) Michael led a regional public university: 11,000 students, seven colleges, a cabinet of 10 VPs averaging 21 years of experience each. Combined credentials that could staff a small think tank. Combined ability to finish what they started? Roughly equivalent to a book club that's been "reading" the same book for three years. What Michael inherited: 6 major strategic priorities. 23 sub-initiatives. 14 presidential task forces. 8 pilot programs in "evaluation." 147 action items. Zero clear accountability for whether any of it was working. His first six months were consumed by progress reports: "We had three focus groups." "We're gathering stakeholder input." "We're exploring best practices." Activity everywhere. Impact nowhere. Then Michael did something radical. He stopped playing the Comparison Game. He asked his cabinet one question: If we could only do three things exceptionally well over the next two years — three things that would demonstrably transform student outcomes — what would they be? The room went silent. His VP of Student Affairs said what everyone was thinking: "Are you saying we stop doing everything else?" "I'm saying we stop pretending we're doing everything else. Right now, we're doing 23 things at 40% quality. I'm proposing we do 3 things at 95% quality." Months 1–3: Eliminated 20 of 23 initiatives. Dissolved 11 of 14 task forces. Concentrated resources on three priorities: first-year experience transformation, career-connected learning, and faculty excellence in teaching. Months 4–12: Meetings dropped from 3.5 hours to 90 minutes. Decision velocity increased 4x. Implementation completion rate went from 34% to 89%. Year 2 results: First-year retention: +8.7% — largest single-year increase in school history Career placement within 6 months of graduation: +12.3% Faculty teaching excellence scores: +15% across all colleges Cabinet meeting time: cut in half Leadership team: "Finally feels like we're making progress instead of managing chaos" Same people. Same budget. Same external constraints. Same competitive environment. Different game. If you recognize the gap between your cabinet's talent and what you're actually producing together — and you suspect another individual development program won't close it — this is exactly what The TEAM INSTITUTE was built for. Not a workshop. Not a retreat. An 8-month sequential operating system your entire cabinet builds together, from trust to focused execution, applied to your actual strategic challenges. We don't fix people. We multiply systems. More on that below. The Application: Switching Games Here's what to do this week — assuming your calendar isn't already booked with meetings about meetings, in which case, that's actually your first problem: Step 1: The Brutal Subtraction Audit (90 minutes, next cabinet meeting) Put every current "strategic priority" on the board. Not just the official ones — the real ones. Every initiative people are actually working on. Every pilot being "evaluated." Every task force meeting monthly. Ask three questions about each: Does this produce measurable transformation in student outcomes — not stakeholder engagement, not data gathered, actual outcomes? Are we providing 70% or more of what this initiative actually needs to succeed, or are we setting people up to fail while calling it strategic? And does this build future capacity, or will it always require its own dedicated resources? Then force rank everything. Not 'these are all important.' Actual forced ranking. Stop at three. Everything below three? Stop doing it. Not 'deprioritize.' Not 'put on hold.' Stop. (Someone will invoke sunk cost: 'But we've already invested so much in X!' The investment is already gone. The question is whether you keep throwing resources at it. That's not strategy. That's loyalty to a decision that isn't working.) Step 2: The Capacity Calculation (30 minutes, solo) For each of your top three priorities, calculate the actual hours per week required — from the leadership team and from implementation teams — multiplied by 42 working weeks. Add all three together. Do you actually have that capacity, or are you assuming people will "make it work" by eliminating evenings and weekends? If the honest answer is no, you're still in the Addition Game. Reduce scope, eliminate something else, or accept that you're asking people to work unsustainably. Pick one. Step 3: The Multiplication Protocol (Ongoing) For the next 90 days, before adding any new initiative, task force, pilot, or "exploration," your cabinet must answer one question: What are we stopping to create space for this? Not "we'll find time." An actual answer. If you can't name what you're stopping, you can't start the new thing. Track two numbers: addition-to-subtraction ratio (1:1 or better means you're in the Multiplication Game) and implementation completion rate (below 50% means scattered attention producing scattered results; 80%+ means you've actually switched games). On the Objections: "But our board expects us to address all of these areas." Your board expects outcomes, not activity reports. What would happen if you walked in with this: "We focused all our capacity on three priorities. First-year retention is up 8.7%. Career placement is up 12.3%. Faculty excellence scores are up 15%." Boards don't micromanage success. They micromanage stagnation. Produce compound results and they stop asking why you're not doing more. The Maturity Shift On priorities: "We need to be doing more to stay competitive." → "We need to be doing less, exceptionally well, to actually transform." On activity: Confuses meetings completed with momentum. → Measures transformation produced, not initiatives launched. On the competition: Watches what peers are doing and adds to the list. → Watches what's working internally and multiplies it. On capacity: Assumes "we'll find time." Burns people out. Repeats. → Calculates actual capacity. Subtracts before adding. Compounds. You're not behind. You've been playing the wrong game. The Multiplication Game is harder to start — subtracting things you've invested in, having honest conversations about actual capacity, saying no to things that matter — but it's infinitely more sustainable. And the institutions winning it? They look boring from the outside and transformational from the inside. Your Turn: Which game is your cabinet actually playing? Drop one word in the comments: COMPARISON, INNOVATION, or MULTIPLICATION. Then tag a cabinet member who you think would answer differently than you would. That gap in perception? That's the data. Or screenshot the three game descriptions and text them to your leadership team with one question: "Which game are we actually playing right now?" Ready to Stop Playing Catch-Up? Here's what I know after studying 987 leadership teams across 43 states: the cabinet that can't agree on three priorities isn't struggling with strategy. It's struggling with trust. Without trust, subtraction conversations become political. Capacity calculations become weaponized. Forced ranking becomes a turf war. That's why the Multiplication Game isn't something you implement from a newsletter. You need your entire cabinet in the room, building the same foundation, in sequence — not a two-day retreat you'll never quite finish, but a sustained developmental arc that actually rewires how your team thinks together. That's what The TEAM INSTITUTE was built to do. The TEAM INSTITUTE is an 8-month journey that takes your cabinet from individually brilliant to collectively unstoppable — sequentially, through trust, empowerment, collaboration, and focused execution, each month building on the last. You can't skip trust and go straight to strategy. That's not leadership development. That's wishful thinking with a facilitator. The results from teams that complete the full sequence: 3x performance improvement. 29% higher engagement. 27% better organizational outcomes. Zero burnout increase. Not because we fixed anyone — because we changed the system they were operating in. The requirement is simple and non-negotiable: full cabinet participation. Partial engagement produces partial results. You cannot build team-level multiplication with individual-level development. That's the model that got you here. If you're a leader who sees the gap between your cabinet's talent and your collective results — and you're ready to stop treating that gap as a motivation problem — let's talk. Schedule a 30-minute consultation to explore whether The Team Institute is the right fit for your leadership context. This isn't a sales pitch. It's a conversation between people who refuse to accept that "busy" and "effective" mean the same thing. [LEARN MORE] higherperformancegroup.com [SCHEDULE CONSULTATION] Found value in this? Help other educational leaders find it: → Repost with your honest answer — which game is your cabinet actually playing? → Tag a leader who's exhausted from the Addition Game and ready to switch → Comment with the one initiative you know you should stop but haven't — naming it is the first step The more leaders who shift from addition to multiplication, the better our educational systems become. Follow DR. JOE HILL and Higher Performance Group for weekly Team Intelligence insights. Next issue: "Your Cabinet Mistakes Consensus for Alignment (And It's Killing Every Decision)" We'll explore why your leadership team spends three meetings nodding in agreement, then fragments in seventeen different directions the moment they leave the room. Spoiler: You don't have an alignment problem. You have a 'we've never actually defined what alignment means' problem. And the text messages your VPs send each other after cabinet meetings? Those are where your real strategic plan lives. Dr. Joe Hill | Higher Performance Group | The Team Institute higherperformancegroup.com
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