The Best Reason to Fire Someone (and How To Do It Well)

May 17, 2022

The first time I heard the phrase “stay in joy or leave in peace,” I snickered.


Early in my leadership career, I had to make the painful decision to let someone go. That phrase ceased being funny.


Human resource decisions are challenging. They should be. After all, people are not resources but humans. These people have families. They have friends. They’ve committed to the campus and potentially to you.


Letting them go feels like a lose-lose situation. On one side, they lose a job. On the other side, you lose a team member. You’ll immediately face the challenging task of replacing them and losing the relationship.

It’s not easy to remain colleagues after a breakup.


With so much to lose and the drought in new talent out there, it’s tempting never to let anyone go, right?


Keeping an underperforming person who isn’t wearing the team jersey isn’t showing kindness. Don’t think for a hot second, that you’re being altruistic in avoiding the difficult conversation. Ensuring you have smart and healthy people on the team is the leader’s most important responsibility.


Letting a person go costs you something but keeping them costs you much more.



The Cost to Keep People Who Need to Leave in Peace

Mission delivery is the charge of every leader. Keeping people who need to leave hampers the mission. Leaders shouldn’t allow that to happen. There’s too much at stake.


When you refuse to let the WRONG person go, all the RIGHT people suffer. Your team dies a thousand deaths watching you protect your underperformers. When you allow average team members to hang on for too long, they become a toxin in the cultural water system, and the results are catastrophic.


Your RIGHT leaders will end up leaving instead.


But there’s something even more important at stake here — the person who isn’t succeeding.



The Entrapment of Indifference

I thought a lot about what word to use. Entrapment seems inappropriate, but when I consider the harm done when you knowingly keep a person who has no future in the system, my mind drifts to entrapment and confinement. You ensnare and trap people when they no longer have control of their destiny.


What else would you call keeping a team member who simply has nowhere to go, so they keep showing up for you? 


First things first. When a person is struggling to succeed, you should do everything to help them become successful. You owe that to them.


  1. Is it a skill issue? You owe it to them to coach them up.
  2. Is it a talent fit issue? You owe it to them to try moving them to a different position.
  3. Is it a competence issue? You owe it to them to train them up.


However, if this is a motivational issue, you owe them nothing, and it’s time to make the hard decision and help them “leave in peace.”


Those not motivated to be Higher Performance players in your organization are the WRONG people on your team.


When you keep team members around knowing they have no long-term future with you, you rob them of what could be best for them. Every passing day that you hesitate or avoid a difficult conversation is another day they lose for their future.


Think about this: When you keep team members who need to move on, you are literally robbing them of what could and should be true in their best work forward.



The 10 Step Process of Helping the Wrong People Leave in Peace

I’ve had the unfortunate task of firing several people. In each case, I did what I could to help them succeed in the role. But when I realized they didn’t have a long-term future in the system, I had no choice but to let them go.


For everyone, the process was similar.


1. Start with a few lovingly clear conversations.

No staff member should ever feel surprised by a termination. Of course, no matter how clear you are, the person will act surprised when they eventually are let go. That’s part of the painful process. But as far as it depends on you, be transparent throughout the journey. Be loving, but be very, very clear. Too many leaders dance around the issue allowing confusion to seep into the expectation. Be clear. Be loving, AND be very clear. 


Also, it’s often helpful to have a third-party present for these conversations. This individual can help ensure that the communication and next steps are clear.


2. Help them become successful.

Remember points #1 - #3 above. If they are on your team, they are your responsibility. You owe it to your team to support their success. You cannot skip this part of the process. 


3. Maintain connection.

As you work to develop their skills, position, and/or competence, it’s imperative to remain connected. Your proximity will show support and reveal progress.


4. Set up regular check-ins.

After the initial lovingly clear conversation, proactively set up weekly check-in meetings to gauge progress and offer additional support. Again, as the leader, you owe it to the struggling team member to support their development.


5. Move to an objective plan.

If clear progress is not seen, create a detailed 30, 60, and 90-day plan. This plan must include specific and scheduled tasks and behaviors. Clarity is kind. People deserve to know where they stand and what will happen if they do not perform. If you find yourself in this position, bring the plan in written form for both parties to acknowledge (and sign). Again, seek clarity. Ensure the consequences for failing the plan are explicit. Furthermore, having a third-party present for this conversation is wise.


6. Progress monitor.

Monitoring progress seems obvious, but it’s too often missed in the process. We get busy, and it becomes easy to slide this responsibility into the other “non-urgent” pile. Schedule these meetings in advance. If you give a plan and don’t monitor and support along the way, you become the underperforming leader.


7. When you know. Go!

When you know without a doubt that satisfactory progress is not being made, resolutely decide to let them go. Again, if you delay the final conversation, you are the underperforming leader. When you realize they don’t have a future in the system, it’s time for a challenging but loving conversation.


  • They won’t agree.
  • They will act surprised.
  • They won’t want to be your friend.


But reframe all of that. You’ll be freeing them to pursue another opportunity where they can have a brighter future.


Note: If possible, provide a financial offramp. Give them a month or two (or more) of full salary and benefits without any obligation to contribute to the organization.


8. Communicate well.

At this point, it’s time to inform key team members and stakeholders of this personnel change. This can be tricky. Note: Keep all the dirty laundry in the hamper. It’s not helpful information. Simply set up a communication timeline in conjunction with the person leaving the organization. I’ve found that writing the email content for their exit and allowing them to see it and suggest adjustments before sending it is an honoring gesture.


9. Begin succession planning. 

With integrity, only at this point should you begin searching for their replacement. Leaders are tempted to keep people around while they interview behind closed doors. This may help reduce the gap between the person leaving and their replacement, but it is not honoring the person leaving or the character of your culture. Make the breakup clean before you begin searching for a replacement.


10. Document like a boss.

Literally, in every meeting and following each conversation in this performance management process, document everything and distribute the conversation to those involved in the process. Documentation is essential to provide clarity and vital for any potential negative behavior on behalf of the leaving member. 



Conclusion

As hard as these conversations will be, I fully believe the kindest thing you can do for every team member is to fight for their success. If that cannot happen inside your system, it’s your job to help them grasp that reality and move towards a brighter future. “Staying in joy or leaving in peace” isn’t poor leadership humor; it’s a loving way to prioritize people above all else.



Who HASN’T lost momentum this year? Please raise your hand.


Losing momentum is natural. 


 Getting it back before it becomes normalized must be a top team priority. 


 ❓ Why?


 Because everyone deserves to live in a community served by healthy teams and highly reliable systems.


 To help achieve this goal, I’ve created a brand-new guide that I’m very excited to share with you!


 ➜ It’s called: 5 Evidence-Based Practices to Reclaim More Team Engagement with Less Effort.


 I'm making this exclusive guide FREE for you today!


 But you must act now…


 …the gravitational pull toward indifference is sweeping across our campuses and, when left unchallenged, will create average performance (at best).


 Indifference draws a crowd, and your community deserves better than average performance.


 💥 Leaders Create Culture.


 ➜ This practical guide will give you actionable items you can use to sharpen your advantage and reclaim your team’s momentum again. 


Grab this just-released FREE guide here: 👇🏼https://www.higherperformancegroup.com/reclaim

Press on!


Joe

Founder, President: Higher Performance Group


P.S. Here are the two best ways I can help you right now:


1) Get your FREE guide: 
5 Evidence-Based Practices to Reclaim More Team Engagement with Less Effort. 
www.higherperformancegroup.com/reclaim


2) Schedule a Call: 
Let’s talk about the obstacles (and opportunities) that you & your team are currently facing. 
www.higherperformancegroup.com/schedule

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